I was so excited when the Green’s called me to photograph their little foursome. I had photographed Laura and Jay’s wedding back in 2005 and knew then that they would have the most fabulous children if they ever decided to do so. And boy, do they ever! These two little ladies just radiate light and life. Life is rich for the Green’s…
This family vacations in Colorado every year for six weeks, totally secluded in a hidden cabin that was built in the 1800’s. They haul up their own water, eat pie in the woods, take fire heated hot tubs, tell each other secrets in their tree house and love life together. I want this life…
I haven’t been blogging lately, not because I don’t have a ton of great images to post but because it hasn’t been a top priority. Having a 18 month old is keeping me busy and then there are the weddings and the 5 shoots a week and editing, etc, etc. But I do want to catch up and especially showcase a lot more of my portrait work. It seems like last summer all I blogged were weddings. This summer, I’m going to try to blog more family themed work. The Kessler’s are great subjects to build momentum with. I adore them. I photographed Rachel and Jake’s wedding, engagement photos and did a family session a year ago with them when Ruby was 1. Now Ruby is 2 and I’m so in awe of how sweet this little threesome is and of what great parents Rachel and Jake have become. And Ruby is just delicious. I think the photos and the faces say it all.
I was so honored when Katy contacted me to do some engagement and family portraits in their hometown of San Francisco. It is always a treat to get “away” for a day and shoot in an entirely new environment. I flew in Thursday morning and was back home by Friday afternoon. It was a short jaunt, and without Ramona or Jesse with me, I seriously got the best night sleep I’ve since I was 6 months pregnant. The trip with worth it just for that. But seriously, Katy and Orlando are ADORABLE. I love their energy. They are playful, loving and if I can say so, pretty freaking sexy! I had a great time photographing them down at the embarcadero and then outside their amazing home in Pacific Heights (where they have the most excellent views of both the city and the bay).
I have been playing with the idea of going back to shooting film exclusively–at least for smaller shoots like this one. I shot 3 rolls of 36 ex Fuji Velvia 800. I overexposed these by a stop and a half for the darker mid-tones and then tweaked them a bit in Lightroom for skin tones and black and white conversions.
Meet Cara, Herb and baby Addie. I met Cara at a breastfeeding support group back in April. A kindred spirit and fellow artist, I was instantly drawn to her, and her sweet Addie is just six weeks younger than Ramona. It’s a friendship that I hope will continue to unfold. Cara and Herb had me over to do a “day in the life of shoot” which is my very favorite style in which to photograph. We started at their house in Addie’s nursery where Herb and Cara shared the task of dressing the little monkey, then a late morning nap and then on to their Saturday ritual of walking the Pearl St. Farmers market and a stop at their favorite coffee shop. It was really fun to watch and document a day in this families life. It made me excited for having a few open Saturdays next summer to participate in my own weekend family traditions.
Thanks, Cara and Herb for letting me document this moment in your family’s life so honestly.
This is exactly what I would like all of my family sessions to look more like. A real, true “day in the life of” shoot. There was not a single shot posed or contrived. I simply showed up to the Carlson’s beautiful Lafayette farm and photographed this family doing exactly what they do everyday. Of course most families would like images of everybody looking at and smiling for the camera. Even I want some of those of my family. Those are beautiful too, and I can certainly do that and certainly do. But it’s the honest moments in life that are forgotten if not captured. The table conversations, the picking of ripe fruit off the apple tree, the children’s art hung in the stairwell, the bedtime stories, the wet dog. These are the moments that should be preserved. These are the moments that I’m most passionate about in my work. Thank you to the Carlson’s for giving me the opportunity to do exactly what is is that I love to do.
I’ve neglected the portrait portion of blogging for too long. I’m busting butt this time of year with weddings–the shooting, post production, blogging, premieres, etc. While it’s my favorite season, weddings are “mega” shoots that tend to overshadow my portrait work when it comes to my blog. But today when I was editing this shoot I said to myself, “this session must be blogged”. It was a sweet, simple shoot of three sisters. It made me think of my own sister–how far apart we are and how much I miss her being a part of Ramona’s life on a day to day basis. We shared a room for years, walked to school together, pulled each others hair, cried together, sang together, and most importantly, can commiserate on how crazy our parents can be. She’s my blood, a piece of my soul, a mirror sometimes. I wish we had photos taken together like this when were were teens.
… And Ruby is one. I can’t believe how fast life moves. I feel like it was just a year ago that I was photographing Rachel and Jake’s wedding– when it was actually almost 5 years ago that they tied the knot. Now they are celebrating a new chapter in their lives–a new love, an unbelievable love, a wild ride, a scary and funny and honest journey. And Ruby is one. Wow. She’s a precious little bean– gorgeous and smart and crawling all over the place like a little spider. She lights up her mama’s eyes and brings a constant smirk to her daddy lips. Now that I’m a mama myself, I can’t tell you how precious these first year images are. Babies grow so fast–every week there’s a new milestone. I’m so fortunate to get to be friends with the Kesslers and will hopefully continue to photograph this incredible journey they are on. First it was two, now it’s three… and who knows. I think these guys should have a few more. They are amazing parents and glowing like I’ve never seen them. Happy birthday, sweet Ruby–you’re a lucky gal to have such remarkable parents.
The Shamas’s are my dream client. They live in a funky apartment on capital hill, have a fantastic sense of style, and are all around a fun loving family. It’s abundantly clear, that these three are in love with their lives.
I never know what I’m going to get when I set up a photo shoot. I can only imagine what and how my “scene” will unfold based on email exchanges, phone calls and addresses, but when I walked into the Shama’s bohemian apartment and was greeted with a big smile and a hug from Leila, I thought “jackpot”. Then, when I laid my eyes on baby Tait, I was in love. I think he looks like my little Ramona–I mean seriously, they could be siblings! But Leila and Brian’s “head over heals love” for their chubby little Tait was what made this shoot so fun. I hardly had to work at all–just a few clicks of the shutter and a few ISO changes, to capture the interactions and life of this super cool, stunningly beautiful, and marvelously happy family. These guys booked 2 sessions with me, so I’ll be back soon to capture more. Yay! Stay tuned…
I feel like somewhat of an impostor posting these images. I’ve actually felt like an impostor since the day I realized that my milk was never fully coming in and had to give Ramona a bottle of formula. I even felt like an imposter at my breastfeeding support groups. The truth is, I was never able to breastfeed my baby entirely, and I’ve been a “want-to-be ” breastfeeding mama since day one. I know that I’m being hard on myself–I know that the very small amount of breast milk that I was able to feed my daughter was invaluable and I should be proud that I worked to give her any at all. In fact I read that just 3oz a day will be enough to pass on immunities. But what I yearned for, and what I’m mourning, is the bond that occurs with breastfeeding a baby, and the comfort of knowing that I alone could continue to grow my baby outside the womb. So today, as I post these beautiful images, I am waiving the white flag and surrendering after a long and heartbreaking fight to breastfeed. I am sure that there are a lot of readers out there thinking that I could have made this work–I’ve had dozens of people offer up their advice as to how to make my milk come in. But I have to stop right here and say that I have never, in my entire life, worked harder at something. I pumped 8 times a day. I woke up in the middle of the night, even when Ramona was sleeping to pump. When that didn’t work, I added drugs and took Domperidone. I used an S&S feeding tube and taped one end to my nipple and put the other end into a bottle so Ramona didn’t get nipple confusion. I tried chinese medicine, acupuncture, a 72 hour skin to skin breastfeeding marathon, synthroid, metformin, prayer and anything else that might increase my supply. But the bottom line, is that my body would simply not produce enough milk to fully feed my daughter. At first, I used donor milk, but when my donor could only provide 50% of what Ramona needed and I was still supplementing with formula, I gave that up. And purchasing donor milk was out of the questions at $3.50 an ounce. I’m saving that for Ramona’s college tuition. And honestly, I don’t have a huge issue with formula. It’s food. Bottom line. And Ramona needed to eat. More than anything, I just wanted to bond with my daughter, and instead of the bond, we were fighting at the breast. Ramona would get so frustrated, that she would scream and cry and turn her head while pulling my nipple in her mouth. I had sores. Blood. Tears. It was hard. It is hard. I look at these images of me breastfeeding and tear up because I wanted this so much, and when I photograph other mom’s breastfeeding their babies, I get envious. It just didn’t work out for me. And today, I’m throwing in the towel.
I need to say here that I have no issue with mamas who choose not to breastfeed. I don’t subscribe to the whole “formula is poison” philosophy. Actually formula feeding does have its perks including Dad being able to take a night shift, and the ability to work without having to find a closet to pump in. I’m not even sure why I’m sharing this. It’s extremely personal and I feel vulnerable putting this out there, but I guess it is catharsis, and maybe there are other women out there who have had a similar struggle that might take comfort in knowing that they are not alone. I guess sometimes breastfeeding just isn’t in the cards. I’m crossing my fingers that with my next baby, things will be different. Until then… Here’s to Dad taking a turn!
Thank you, my darling Caitlin for taking these intimate photographs. You are my life saver, sister and friend, and you truly inspire me with your amazing talent. I will treasure these photos forever. They will remind me daily how truly blessed I am to have such a beautiful healthy baby girl. After all, that’s all the matters in the end.
A lot has transpired since I last photographed Katie and Christian at their wedding back in 2009— Pregnancy, 2 babies, a new house…it’s incredible how fast life moves. I adore Katie and Christian, and their two babies, Greyson and Zooey are precious additions to this stellar couple. It was really fun to watch and document this family interact. You can see that Katie and Christian not only love being parents, but are still enjoying one another. As for Zooey and Greyson–they simply stole my heart….
For the last couple of years, Kyle has had me take photos of him with his brilliant daughter, Avalon. I think he does these with his Mother in mind, as the shoot is usually around mother’s day, but I seriously can’t think of a sweeter way to celebrate Kyle and Avalon’s relationship. These two are buds, through and through and I love that Kyle is having these moments captured for Avalon to look back on one day as well. There’s nothing like a girl and her Daddy… so precious.
Man, do I love this age! I don’t want to rush a minute with my Ramona, but I have to say, I’m looking forward to this stage in her little life. Emma Rose is a RIOT! Miss personality. She’s a performer through and through. She knows what she wants and gets it. She’s also a tough little cookie. With her older 2-year-old brother, Porter she has to put up with a bit of physical rough and touch, if you will. I had a great time with the Sowa’s documenting this stage in their families life. Can’t wait to see Emma Rose again when she is Porter’s age. Watch out world!
I’ve dusted off the trusty cameras and am back to grind. While I’ve been savoring every second with Ramona and of being a new mother, it feels pretty good to get back to doing something that is 100% me. I get to express myself artistically and tell stories again. I get to people watch, and study and capture the human condition… Of course I’ve been photographing my little Ramona like a crazy woman (that will be Monday’s post), but there is just something different and exciting about going to a stranger’s house for a family session, or meeting at a seedy hotel for a edgy boudoir. It’s almost an adventure, and I’ve missed those. The Dillman’s were my first official shoot back to work. They are regular clients and I’ve been photographing them since Shami was pregnant with her first, Landon. This shoot was the last in a series of 4 that I’ve done over the last 16 months for them–a “watch me grow” package for baby Levi—so not exactly an adventure, but I will say it was a great way to get my feet wet again. I’m loving family documentary photography even more now that I have my own little bean, and I think I am approaching shoots with even more empathy and more honesty… So without further ado, meet Shami, Dan, Landon and little levi.
It’s good to be back!
I have learned a very important first lesson in parenting… We have very little control.
I became a mama about 2 months into my pregnancy. I was in denial the first month and had no real connection to the little sprout in my womb, but something happened after I heard Ramona’s heartbeat. She became real and I started to believe that this pregnancy, although somewhat of a shock, was probably meant to be. The timing couldn’t have been more perfect, and honestly if Jesse and I were to ever have children it probably needed to happen sooner rather than later. Unfortunately, we women do have a shelf life when it comes to fertility. I hate that.
I immediately started reading voraciously about what would now be the new direction of my life and quickly became a little obsessed with natural childbirth. It has always seemed so beautiful to me–so natural and perfect and empowering. I’ve photographed it, heard about it, and was now reading hundreds of positive birth stories from Ina May’s “Guide to Childbirth”. After weighing all the pros, cons, benefits and risks of a natural childbirth vs. a medically monitored birth in a hospital, Jesse and I decided to use the Mountain Midwifery. We would stay out of the hospital completely, go drug free and I would be empowered and experience that amazing rite of passage for women. I was excited–and maybe even a bit self-righteous about our choice.
I woke up Monday morning, January 23rd at 7:30 and rolled over in bed to tell Jesse, “Today was the day”. I was having contractions–real contractions. I called my mom, who would be my doula and Caitlin, who would photograph the birth and gave them a heads up that it was “on”.
I loved early labor. It hurt a little, but I felt euphoric. We took walks into the early hours of Tuesday morning, watched a little Louis C.K. and waited for my contractions to get to 3 minutes apart, lasting 1 minute long. I should have slept for a few of those hours and would have, had I know I had another 24 hours of grueling labor ahead of me. By Tuesday afternoon, my contractions came on strong. They were 4 minutes apart and very painful. I was in active labor–and guess what, it was rush hour, and to get to the mountain midwifery we had to drive I-25 to Santa Fe–pretty much the worst two roads at rush hour. This is when all of our “birth plans” went terribly awry.
I won’t get into the hairy details, but I basically labored at the Mountain midwifery for 10 hours—in the water, out of the water, on all 4’s, in a birth sling, on a birth ball, sitting over the toilet backwards, and every other imaginable position. But my body never went into full labor. My contractions were so horrifically painful, and I was so tired that I actually lost time. I asked my mom later if I passed out because I don’t remember a thing about the last 4 hours of the delivery. My body went into a state of shock and I left it. Our midwife decided that we need to go to the hospital to deliver this baby, and at that point I was relieved. I actually thought I might die. The hospital was everything I didn’t want. Every single thing that I hoped to bypass medically, was used. Pitocin, epidural, internal fetal monitor, and then ultimately a C-section (which I will now call a cesarean birth). My little Ramona was showing signs of distress, so thank God the Dr.s called for a cesarean birth. She came out surgically with the cord wrapped around her neck three times and laboring to breath. I knew she was a little acrobat in my tummy!
Ramona came into this world Wednesday morning, January 25th at 7:30am (48 hours after my contractions started) weighing 6.10 and measuring 19 inches long. She’s a peanut.
Today, I am grateful for my journey to get her into the world. I am grateful for the choices I made, the things I learned, the people I met, the Mountain midwifery, and I’m even thankful for surgery. I’m thankful for the epidural. Very thankful! I’m thankful for my precious baby girl, my darling husband and my amazing mother who both coached me and cheered me through the entire 36 hours of intense natural labor, and then held my hand through surgery. But I did learn that when push comes to shove (literally), we really don’t have control. My Ramona was trying to tell me that she wouldn’t come out that way–that if she had, it could have strangled her. I learned that as much as I prayed that my milk would come in, the trauma to my body and the need to heal from surgery would make this difficult… and these are all just the beginnings of the great journey of parenthood. I need to let go, buckle up and enjoy the wild ride. Welcome to Motherhood, Julie… the adventure of my lifetime thus far. And the most beautiful one at that. For I am truly in love with my Ramona Moon….
My heartfelt thanks to my dear friends who provided some of the following photos… Caitlin Rose and Paige Elizabeth.
I wouldn’t hesitate to say that my very favorite thing to photograph is documentary style family photos, if all of my clients were like the Sperry’s. This family has been one of my regulars since Malia was pregnant with her first, and they continue to welcome me into their home every year to document a day in their life. It’s relaxed, fun, the kids are spontaneous and love showing me their rooms and toys and in this case, Halloween costumes… What a treat.
I honestly can’t think of a more beautiful day in the life of portrait session. Danielle asked if I could do some portraits of her and her baby girl, skin to skin. She wanted to capture this fleeting time between her and her 5 month old daughter, breastfeeding, bathing, snuggling… It was so precious. So natural. So perfect. I absolutely love these images and was honored to be able to snap a few shots of these intimate rituals between Danielle and baby Ava.
I have to say I loved everything about this shoot—the harsh morning light, the chaotic shadows, the amazing “dream home” in boulder on a little brook, the laid back nature of mama who watched on as her boys played, and the yummy authentic personality of these boys. To me, this shoot was the perfect “day in the life of ” portrait of the Schnitzer boys and their modern, Huckleberry Finn morning in Boulder, CO.
Man, oh man, do I love the Holt’s–they are one of my favorite “regulars”. I love their mid-century, ranch style home, their laid back way of life, their incredible sense of style, and of course I love these kiddos! And there is a new addition to the Holt’s since I worked with them last. Meet Amalia–or “Molly” as they call her. Oh my goodness, I could just eat her up. She’s just as bubbly and full of life as her big brother, Merrick, and she’s only 4.5 months old–I can’t wait to see her little spirit in a year… What a treat it is to have such amazing clients.
I got to spend some time with the Daley’s and their sweet little baby, Levi last Saturday morning. It was rainy and cold and the perfect day for two new parents to settle in with their newborn, cup of coffee and good music. Because I’m pregnant with my first, I’m starting to really enjoy these shoots and empathize with families in a new way. I dream about how I want Jesse and I photographed with the little one when she arrives and I think a documentary approach is so sweet at this stage–especially since there is no real control over the babies emotions or reactions to me being there. I loved how quite and intimate this shoot felt. Amy and Matt are adjusting incredibly and are so in love with little Levi that they hardly noticed I was there, which is exactly the way I like to shoot.
If it comes to me starting my blog all over, with a fresh start and fresh content, then I can’t think of better faces to launch with. Meet the Goodberry’s. Cynthia is a colleague in the wedding industry here in Denver and is the best makeup artist EVER. Check her out at www.denvermakeupguru.com. Not only would I pay her everyday to do my makeup if I could, she has become one of my very best friends, and I am absolutely in love with her family! She and her amazingly chill husband, Jim are bringing up three beautiful children and doing a damn fine job–I only hope Jess and I can come close to their incredible parenting skills and love for one another.
Nadine is a precocious 7 year old with perfect trendles and a smile to die for. We went camping together and she brought a birdwatching book. Not a kids birdwatching book, mind you–but a real encyclopedia of birds and their habitats. She is a determined sweetie pie who will go far.
Natalie is my little firecracker friend. Just three, she talks about viruses and collects baby reptiles. When she holds them in her hands, her voice changes into a high pitched baby voice saying “Awww—look at this cute little baby garter snake”, as if she even needs to use a baby voice! She’s going to be trouble! But in the best way possible.
Baby Jimmy is hilarious! He doesn’t talk much, but he is a huge flirt and his natural athletic ability astounds me. He climbs up on the slide and os down it in 2 seconds flat. And he struts. Cynthia thinks he’s going to be a little Matthew McConaughey when he grows up—and I agree. He’s going to knock em’ down–maybe literally.
I love this family so much. And I couldn’t think of a better way to spend my morning than to sift through these photos and post about 5 of my favorite people.
It’s been officially over a month since my last entry. That’s the longest stint I have ever gone without blogging. I really wish I could say I had a good excuse for not writing to you, but unfortunately my excuse is lame–I have been enjoying some down time. Simply put, I have been swimming, basking in the sun, taking hikes, going to concerts, spending evenings with friends, walking down to Spuntino’s for ice cream, and riding my bike. I even made a blueberry pie last night! Basically I’m doing all the fun summer things that most get to do in June that I rarely get the pleasure of enjoying because I am so slammed with summer shoots and weddings. And when I do have a second, I’m writing to you, dear blog. But this summer’s wedding season is a late bloomer. My first official wedding was last week and now I’ll be in work mode through Mid-October, diligently shooting and blogging. And I do have one other small excuse. I’m waiting for a brand new fancy blog. This new blog has been under construction since March and every week I think it will be done and I can go live with some amazing shoot or story to tell. But alas, it’s taking FOREVER and I simply can’t wait any longer. Please forgive me blog. I will visit you more frequently, I promise. And for those of you who actually read this blog, do stay tuned for some exciting posts and a new look!
xoxo
So without further ado, I give you Leah and Adam–two of the coolest cats I’ve had the pleasure working with. These two are super laid back foodies who enjoy good art, good times, and being good parents to their cute doggies, Max and Madison. It was Leah and Adam’s idea to cook dinner for their engagement session which I though was brilliant. I met them at Marczyk’s where they picked out some fancy ingredients for dinner. Then they drove me to their amazing city park apartment in their sweet ride—a vintage land cruiser. Basically I felt cool just being around them… We landed at city park. It was a great engagement session–very “day in the life of” Leah and Adam. I am looking forward to their wedding this Sunday at Botanic Gardens.
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